he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
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