i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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