i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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