Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN. http://tfl.nu/72t6
  Replies (32) Good night (1028) Bad night (3503)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Toronto

  i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight

  (1-905): View more from Toronto

  i totally said that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (905): i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight (1-905): i totally said that http://tfl.nu/40bc
  Replies (19) Good night (4087) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away http://tfl.nu/b3o0
  Replies (45) Good night (709) Bad night (3005)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life

  (619): View more from California

  with a huge shlong

  (440): View more from Ohio

  massive. i wanna make bitches cry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (440): if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life (619): with a huge shlong (440): massive. i wanna make bitches cry http://tfl.nu/imk4
  Replies (39) Good night (5873) Bad night (845)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober" http://tfl.nu/2nrl
  Replies (19) Good night (915) Bad night (4120)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead. http://tfl.nu/ixsn
  Replies (3) Good night (2551) Bad night (928)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (406): i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine. http://tfl.nu/dm6s
  Replies (22) Good night (1159) Bad night (3178)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  This tent reeks of fear and sangria

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): This tent reeks of fear and sangria http://tfl.nu/pbhq
  Replies (3) Good night (1560) Bad night (687)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it. http://tfl.nu/tfef
  Replies (19) Good night (1229) Bad night (2536)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other. http://tfl.nu/w5qg
  Replies (20) Good night (1871) Bad night (791)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (661): It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas http://tfl.nu/7a5h
  Replies (9) Good night (1571) Bad night (792)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (540): It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover. http://tfl.nu/uwnr
  Replies (0) Good night (590) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me. (1-630): Pulling out all the stops on being a lady. http://tfl.nu/6gwr
  Replies (2) Good night (1403) Bad night (521)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from." http://tfl.nu/4vvg
  Replies (6) Good night (1790) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich. http://tfl.nu/2wq9
  Replies (7) Good night (811) Bad night (372)

Randomize