love makes seman taste better
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Boobs speak an international language.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
My breasts were aching with rage.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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