she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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