try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Randomize
