Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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