And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
