Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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