Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
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