remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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