So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize