I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
