That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
