Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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