U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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