No more Irish car bombs ever.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
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Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
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Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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