Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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