Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I think pants incapable of making pants work
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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