brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Randomize