The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
