Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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