What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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