Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
