Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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