6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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