He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
You're like the curious george of whores
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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