God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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