I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Woman Using Lunch Break To Find Another Job Gets Hilariously Snitched On By The Local News
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
28 ‘Thanks For Coming To My Ted Talk Tweets’ Funnier And More Informative Than An Actual Ted Talk
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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