i just wanna soil my oats bro
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
