Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
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