end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
