he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
