I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize