why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
