Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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