I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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