She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
