found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
We are all done wearing pants today
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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