butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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