It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Randomize
