How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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