you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
