My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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