If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
