Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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