She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
