i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize