I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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