So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
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all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
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I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.